Malt to beat the global meltdown

Submitted by MontyGeoffrey on Sun, 11/05/2008 - 20:39

The Mont treated himself to single malt this Sunday (there’s nothing like a whisky to get the Mont a little frisky) out on the balcony in vest and pj’s. And as the faint peaty notes of Islay danced on the old-boy’s tongue, a full moon winked knowingly in the night.

“Monty,” a suitably gravelly and Charlton Heston-like voice beamed. “You look a bit of a sight in those pyjamas.” It might have been the moon, or perhaps it was Mrs. Monty calling from the kitchen – maybe the Charlton Heston bit was imagined?

Whatever the truth, one felt a certain line had been crossed. Whether lunar or luminary, such comments seem misplaced. Monty sits in a private spot for summer maltings and cetainly doesn’t invite opinions on his paisley, cotton or plaid.

As a cold northerly, even in Cyprus it can get a bit parky, brushed its cold fingers against the half finished glass, matters of a greater gravitational force began to weigh heavily on the increasingly slow flickering eyelids. Would global warming put an end to the craft of the men of Tain? Would the lack of snow on the Islay coast spell the demise of this haughty liquid gold? Would this wink from the moon be one of the last? And perhaps, of more immediate concern, should Monty not be storing such extinction threatened stock and salting it away for the retirement fund?

Monty says: Buy whisky as a sure fire spread option to balance your portfolio risk against the perils of climate change.

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